Being a coach is a really beautiful thing. Whether you are a life coach, business coach, relationship or any other type of online service provider, there is a lot we have to do to maintain our brand and business online. We aren’t just service providers- we wear a million hats. We have to be the marketer, the social media guru, a writer, a product creator, a launch specialist, bookkeeper and the list goes on and on.
Coaching is brilliant and fun, but being an entrepreneur isn’t all rainbows and sunshine. There are a lot of moving parts, there is a lot to learn, there are so many things that we need to tackle on a daily basis. All of this “stuff” can lead to overwhelm and a loss of confidence if you let it.
There’s a whole other piece of coaching and being an entrepreneur besides sales, funnels, clients and email lists. There is a mental and emotional piece that also needs to be figured out. There a specific mindset that needs to be put into place in order to be really successful.
I’ve been in this online entrepreneur space for just about two years and I’ve seen a lot. I’ve seen a lot of really good things, success stories and learned a LOT. But I’ve also seen (and experienced) the struggle, the financial trials and the fear. I’ve even see coaches outright quit and go back to corporate because it wasn’t something that they could handle.
Lots of coaching come to me because they are experiencing a lack of confidence. And the bottom line is, it’s all about mindset and practice. You have to learn a new way to be and think that is completely different than being in a corporate or employee mindset.
Today I want to talk about the 7 things I see coaches doing that cause them to lose confidence and how you can prevent it from happening to you.
Comparison– the first and most common thing I see is comparisonitis. This is such an easy trap to fall into especially if social media is a big part of your marketing. You “have” to be on social media to connect and to promote and of course so you don’t miss out. However
i see this cause a lot more problems than it solves. I cant tell you how many times I’ve gotten someone on a call who was upset because they posted an offer and got crickets. Or how they started comparing themselves to the people they saw who were making 5 figures a month or having 6 figure launches.
The thing to remember here is that you aren’t seeing the entire story and everyone is at a different place in their journey. The people you are seeing that have mega success have likely been working their assess off for years. It’s not their first year or even their first business. Before you start comparing remember that you aren’t seeing the entire story and remind yourself that your journey is unique and you are here for a reason.
Social media can be great for many things, but it can also be a curse. If you find yourself getting discouraged after some time on social media, it may be time to take a break. I actually do this every so often. I just stay out of the feed for a few days and check in with myself and my own reality. Facebook groups are not the only way to get clients.
Overthinking– Overthinking in pretty much everything in life will drive you crazy. Especially in business. I get that there is a lot to think about and explore as you are becoming a new coach or entrepreneur, but there also comes a point when you need to trust yourself. Especially as a coach, there are certain things where you need to trust your intuiton or go with your gut.
Thinking and analyzing are great things when used in reason, but sometimes we stay so stuck in our own heads, that our business suffers. Plus, overthinking usually leads to the next reason why coaches lose confidence.
Not taking action– Sometimes all this thinking and analyzing keeps us paralyzed. So much so that we never take action. This is exactly what happened to me when I first started my business. I thought that I had to have all the pieces in place, before I could go out there and coach. I thought I had to have my niche and ideal client down to a tee before I could guest blog or create coaching packages. I thought I had to be the perfect coach before I could coach people- little did I realize that I needed to coach people in order to become a great coach. My advice to all of you, is to just START. Just DO IT. The clarity and experience you seek will only come as a result of doing. If you are feeling stuck or like you’re not good enough, if you are feeling some kind of fear when it comes to going out there and just doing it- take that as a sign that you must just do it. Unless you’re in some kind of physical danger, fear is just a compass. That fear your feel is telling you exactly what your next step should be.
Focusing on the wrong things– One more thing I was guilty off when I first started was wasting time and energy on the wrong things. I spent hours upon hours a day perfecting my website and graphics. This did not bring me money or clients. I focused on so much on making it pretty, but not enough on actually getting people to my site so they could see it and see my packages and want to connect with me. I was definitely in that mindset of build it and they will come- which is so not true for the coaching industry. It just doesn’t work that way.
This is also a question I get asked a lot- “So, what are the money making activities I should be doing daily”. That answer will be different for every person. My suggestion is to do the activities that will actually get you clients. Is spending time in Facebook groups actually getting you clients, or just getting you a lot of friends. There is a big difference. Does guest blogging or launching a digital product get you clients? Then do that. Does you have a high conversion rate when you get people on the phone for a consult or mini session? Then make sure your calendar is full of them.
If you are new, and you’re not sure yet where to get your clients. You will have to do the digging to find out just where they are and how you can put yourself in front of them.
Putting too much pressure on yourself– Yes, we as coaches have to wear many hats, but it doesn’t mean we have to do it all or try everything at the same time. Be very strategic about your activities and about your marketing. Often times we put so much pressure on ourselves that we end up feeling discouraged because we can’t do it all. Well I have news for you- you are a coach, you’re not super woman. If you start to get overwhelmed with daily tasks or you’re just simply not good at a certain thing, outsource it. Hire someone to help you and you will free up a lot of time and energy to do the things you are really good at.
Likewise, when it comes to marketing yourself and putting yourself out there- don’t think you have to do it all. Do what you’re really good at, what excites you and what you enjoy and leave the rest. You don’t like webinars, don’t do them. You hate writing, then don’t blog. There are a ton of different and creative ways to get yourself out there, don’t put yourself in a box and don’t put the world on your shoulders. Trust me, you don’t have to do webinars, blogging, podcasting, videos, pinterest, twitter, linked in, google plus, networking events, workshops and retreats to be successful. You will be successful when you are doing what you truly love.
Forgetting who you are– there is so much noise in this online space, that it’s easy to get sucked into other people’s stuff. Along with all the things I just mentioned, there may come a time, when you start to focus on other people’s shit and forget who you really are. You are trying to hard to fit in, to do what you’re “supposed” to do and you forget why you even started this in the first place. It becomes something that is daunting and stressful instead of something that you enjoy and love doing. If this is happening to you, unplug from everything and check in with yourself. Remind yourself who you really are, what your intentions are for starting this business and the real reason you want to coach. Is it to help people? Is it because it lights you up? Is it because it affords that type of lifestyle that you desire. When you lose yourself, you lose control. This is not only true in relationships but in business as well. It could also be very helpful to set daily or weekly intentions that are based on your own hopes, goals, dreams and desires.
I feel as coaches a lot of times, we get so wrapped up in everyone else that we forget about ourselves. And while yes, we of course want to help people, we have to do it when we are coming from our highest and best selves.
Expectations: Expectations in general can cause a lot of heart aches and loss of confidence, whether they are high expectations, low expectations or no expectations at all. This kind of goes back to the putting pressure on yourself. There should be a reasonable measure of what you intend when you put yourself and your business out there, but don’t be disappointed when things don’t happen exactly the way you want them to. This is an incredible journey, it’s not for the feint of heart and it really is a for a very, very special person to be able to take their love of coaching, or providing a specific service and turning it into a profitable business that they love. So while I think it’s important to set the bar and set yourself some goals and intentions, I also believe that you have to be ready and willing to go with the flow and take whatever happens and make the best of it.